Sleepingfish net

../ ]  [N/08.11.12] [ The Fireman and the Caper
by Justin Dobbs
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N/08.11.25 ]

We hadn't really the time to paint the fireman. Nor paint to paint him with, but we did have him there, down in our basement, and he was sitting there on our couch with the funny-looking grin he always had, with his helmet under his arm, and though we prodded him, we couldn't get him to tell us what we needed to know, which is where to get his wife, nor what we could do to her once we found her, because the fireman was chaste, though we found that he had masturbated. We found that he had masturbated all over the inside of his boxer shorts as we were adjusting his pants, and this is when our mother was trying to find us. Scratch that, it was when we were trying to understand how it was that he had put on the pants, because they didn't seem to have an outlet of any kind.


And today, I swear, I hadn't meant to scramble my brain, but there are things in this world, in my reality, of which you perhaps have no idea. For instance, the electric caterpillar and the caper in which I chased the silly, goose-feathered maniac, the mayor without a clue, the blue-balled evildoer, I chased him down the alleyway, and all the way down to the moon of which had been showing in the water, down into the water, and with a ridiculous amount of splashing... but then he scrambled away into a bar, and then he ordered a something, but the bartender. He said something I would forget. He said, "Look at my hair. Do you see my hair? I have dyed my hair a little. Yes, just a little. I did it this morning. I don't know why. Even so, I feel that I have done a rather terrible thing to myself, but what can I possibly do about? and besides, well, just look all around, you see I have a very busy bar. And just why, you may ask, do we need for the bar to always be open, at least for this time of night? It is because of all the capers, of course, all those criminal going-ons, and the bar is like, well, it's just a relief from those things! although admittedly, inside the bar, is a man, and let's just say that the man's name is Tony, and he's in the back with a mask, and he's holding down a woman. Such terrible things!"

The Fireman and the Caper


Justin Dobbs's
writing has appeared in Lamination Colony, elimae, and other places. He is the co-author of Twin Mother, forthcoming from Happy Cobra Books (2008), and the co-editor of Brain on Lynch, also forthcoming, from Brain Press (2009), both with Blake Butler. He lives in Seattle.

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